Fluff

Last night we had the third eviction on BB7:All Stars.  And, for two weeks in a row, the Chen-Bot was wearing a decent outfit!  Yay Chen-Bot!  You listened to our advice!  I’m so glad.  I couldn’t take another baaaaad outfit, although I am sure there are more to come. 

Tonight’s episode began where Tuesday’s left off.  Dr. Will had already given his “I hate everybody” speech in a cunning move of strategy.  Tonight was Jase’s turn to hate everyone.  He told the gathered group to NOT vote out Dr. Will because he, Jase-Face, hated everyone in the house too.  Stupid poser.  He’s just a copycat.  I wonder if he honestly thought that by parroting the strategy by Dr. Will, he’d be able to save himself?  Or, did he really want to save himself?  He did say to George that he is torn between wanting to stay in the game to win the money for him and his girlfriend and wanting to go home now to see his girlfriend and her daughter.  Decisions, decisions.  Nookie or money?  Which is it going to be? 

Meanwhile, after this drama is over, Dr. Will heads up his bed room with Boogie (**snicker**) and these two begin high fiving and ass slappin each other on a move well played.  I never thought for a second that Dr. Will really wanted to go home.  It was all part of his strategy.  As I asserted in the last entry, I think Dr. Will really is the best player to win the game.  He believes he has wiped the target off of him at least long enough for either him or Boogie (**snort**) to win a HoH.  They believe all they need is to win it once and they can set a chain of events in motion that will leave the two of them vying for the $500,000.  And they may be right.  As much as I protested Dr. Will being back in the game because he was already a winner, I now believe it was a good decision.  He is a great player. 

Erika and Janelle taking a bubblebath together, like all good playboy bunnies do, and invited Boogie (**hahaha**) in there with them.  They barely had the invite out of their mouths before he was in the tub and getting sponged down by these two annoying, vapid beauties.  Of course, this is the highlight of Boogies (**giggle) sad little life.  He does manage to spend some of this time campaigning for his friend Dr. Will while neck deep in bubbles and boobies.  I don’t how far it will go with Janelle, but at least he was trying. 

Jase is out talking to whomever he can to try and drum up votes for Dr. Will to stay in the house.  He talks to Erika and Marcellas, which only pisses him off because they aren’t hearing his stories any more, so he stomps out (like the three year old he apparently is now) and tries to drum up sympathy with Diane and Danielle.  He needs 5 votes to Dr. Will to stay in the house, which means he has to get all of the season 6 weenies to vote with him.  He talks to them and they agree to vote out Dr. Will IF he agrees to put up a floater if he wins HoH next week (that would be Diane and Danielle).  He reveals this deal to Danielle, Boogie (**hee hee**) and Dr. Will, thus sealing his fate.  Stupid.  Why do they all do this?  Why do they make these covert deals and then tell EVERYONE about it.  STUPID. 

The Chen-bot cuts to the houseguests to ask how they are doing.  Chicken George is wearing a tee-shirt that say “Mr. Fart” on the front of it.  This is because he is on slop rations for the week (part of the PoV competition) and it apparently makes Mr. Chicken quite flatulent.  And he proudly shows the entire nation that is a gassy mc gasenbag. Now that’s classy.  If I were his family I’d be SO.PROUD.   She also asks Marcellas how he thinks Kaysar looks without hair.  Of course, his answer is that he looks as good or better without hair, because he’s right.  Kaysar is one sexy ass Iraqi. 

The houseguests are beginning to respect Chicken George a bit, after being sure he’d be the first one gone when he was put back in the house.  He is hanging in there, although I am not quite sure how.  In the HoH room, the Chen-bot has a private conversation with James about the nominations and even he admits his growing affection for the Chicken.  Earlier in the week he couldn’t stand him a bit, and now he respects him as a player?  Why?  Because he got lucky in the PoV competition and ruined all your plans?? 

We interrupt this synopsis for an unprovoked Kaysar attack.  Even bald, isn’t he beautiful?  **swoon**  No wonder Marcellas is in love with him.  You can’t blame him for that!!!

This week, Dr. Will was profiled.  They interviewed his brother and his ex-girlfriend, season 2’s Shannon.  His brother swears he’s not a big liar in real life and Shannon still thinks highly of him.  They fizzled out after the show because she is a go-getter, outdoorsy kind of gal and he is basically a couch potato.  Plus, she finds him too vain, revealing that he botox’s himself and has given himself liposuction.  Ewww.  His profile paints him as the guy you love to hate, but end up loving in the end.  We’ll see. 

Ah, time to cut one of these poor bastards loose.  The Chen-bot pauses dramatically then announces that Jase-Face is gone.  In an unprecidented unanimous vote, the houseguests ALL vote to get rid of the Jase-Face.  One last look at the Jace-Face folks because you know you are going to miss it.  He then gets out of the house with nary a goodbye (bittermuch) and molesters the Chen-bot outside with his hug.  Wow.  When she asks him point blank about the “Mr. & Mrs. Smith” thing with Diane he refuses to answer.  He seems to think that the producers are going to throw one player back into the house this season like they did last season with Kaysar, and he is sure its going to be him.  Ass hat. 

Time for the new HoH ceremony.  This time, they are gathered in the backyard and reminded that there are murals all over the house with words and definitions on them.  The words are HATE, LOVE, DECEIT, BETRAYAL, HONESTY and LOYALTY.  They will be given a word, which is part of the definition of one of these words that is painted on the wall, and the first one to ring in and answer correctly gets to eliminate one person of their choosing from the competition.  If you ring in and are wrong you are out.  Pretty mundane competition, until it gets down to the last three.  The last three standing are Janelle, Marcellas and Kaysar.  Marcellas got it right and had to choose between the two to eliminate one.  He looked from Bunny to Iraqi Peach a few times trying to decide…you could tell he didn’t want to cut either one, but in the end, he eliminated Kaysar.  The next question came along and Janelle answered it correctly, winning the HoH.  I hate her.  Hate her, hate her, hate her.  Blech. 

Okay, I will not be here to give the update on Sunday and may not be back until mid-week.  We are taking my daughter to Chicago for 4 days for her birthday to see the King Tut exhibit (among other things).  Make sure you tune in Sunday at 7pm CST and Tuesday at 7pm CST on CBS for the next episodes.  And don’t miss me too much while I’m gone. 

**as always, screen caps from hamsterwatch.com**

Last night’s Big Brother was actually interesting!! Woo hoo! It’s about damn time this show finally began to pick up speed. We get men in their underwear, a total hissy fit from Jase, Marcellas losing his temper and an explanation as to why George and Kaysar are bald in those pictures I posted on Monday. YAY! On with the show!

BB is shot in Southern California, so it is hot. Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you know that it has been brutally hot in Southern California for the last few weeks. It’s causing power black outs (anyone with a Myspace account knows about that!) and people have died from the extreme heat. The houseguests spend a few lazy days after the nomination ceremony just kind of laying low and trying to stay cool. Chicken George is nervous, nervous, nervous right now. He has to go up against Dr. Will for the eviction this week and feels, probably rightly so, that his only shot at staying in the game one more week is to win this week’s Power of Veto. Dr. Will on the other hand, seems to be in hog heaven. He claims that he loves being nominated. He is absolutely thriving on this!

Jase apparently got wind that he was }this{ close to being nominated this week, so he goes to pay a visit to James. They have this big long talk about integrity and Jase kisses James’ ass tells James that he respects the game he is playing and he respects James as a top player. He wants it to come down to James and Jase as the final two in this game to go head to head. I don’t think so. You keep booger picking like you are in that photo over there and you’ll be gone….it’s GROSS!

Marcellas is in looooove with the “Iraqi Peach”. He is practically drooling all over himself anytime Kaysar walks in the room (I can’t say I blame him though, I do the same thing). He tells Janelle and Danielle that Kaysar’s smell is better than banana cupcakes (which I think is gross, but he must love the things) and that he wishes like hell that Kaysar was gay so they could just get married and live happily ever after. Uh, not in this country Marcellas. At least, not if the Republicans have their way.

Jase raps in the kitchen like a white boy, as does Chicken George. What Jase doesn’t know is that behind his back they are ALL making fun of him and the faces he makes in the mirror when he is fixing his hair. Head tilted, eyes down, lips pursed…its the funniest thing! He spends a great deal of time in the mirror fixing his hair – getting it to look just rumpled and bedheaded without being too messy. He must go through a fortune in product on his hair.

Howie Jackass and George spend some time together in the kitchen. It seems they have struck up an odd relationship. Howie Jackass seems to think he is a Jedi-Master (and he must actually still be 12 years old) and has taken George on as a Jedi apprentice. The Jackass just can’t get any weirder. Knowing that he is probably going home this week, George tells Howie Jackass to go for it and play for all the money. Well, isn’t that what they are all doing there??

Ah, the Power of Veto ceremony!! This one was interesting for a change! As usual, the HoH, and the two nominees are automatically entered to play, they choose the other 3 players out of a bag, which adds Kaysar, Will Boogie (**snort**) and Jase. No girls this time. Janelle acts as the emcee. It’s a game called “How Bad Do You Want It?”. I can answer that for George – he wants it pretty bad…end of game. Nah…this one has a series of tasks, each getting harder to accomplish. The players can choose to play or not after each task is revealed. If they choose not to play, they are out of the competition.

It begins with a slop eating contest. All 6 of them choose to play along. They must eat a bowl of BB slop (what Danielle calls “Satan’s Oatmeal”) in under 5 minutes. Dr. Will gets about 2 bites in and quits. Mike Boogie (**hee hee**) gets about half his bowl down then boots it back up and is out of the competition. The rest make it through to the next round.

The next task requires the remaining players to take off their shirts and pants/shorts and burn them. Here is where I wished fervently that Kaysar is going commando today, but alas, he’s got on knickers. All 4 of them gladly take off their shirts and shorts and burn them. The next task involves allowing the other houseguests to take permanent markers and write whatever they want to on their bodies. Again, all 4 remaining players agree to do it, and successfully complete the task.

Next up is a bath in blueberry puree, which again they all do. And they all end up looking like Smurfs. Blueberries stain the skin BIG TIME. I don’t know how they all got “un-blue” after the competition!! It’s the next task, which causes two of them to finally jump out. The next task is a simple one. All you have to do is agree to be excluded from NEXT week’s Veto competition. Jase and James immediately jump out of line on that one. No way are they giving up their chance to compete in some stupid competition to potentially win the PoV.

Now its down to just one last task, and two players. Just Chicken George and Kaysar are left standing and the final challenge is put to them. Simple, no strenuous activity involved. Just vanity. Shave your head. AHA! That explains the pictures of Kaysar and Chicken George (fat Lex Luthor) I posted on Monday! They both perfom the stunt and now its down to a tie breaker. To be honest, I can’t even remember what the tie breaker question was, but Chicken George got it right, and thus saved himself from the chopping block this week. James is freaking out, because now he has to nominate someone else. He hadn’t counted on George winning the PoV!

After the competition, the season 6ers desend on James in the HoH like a pack of hungry vultures. Get rid of Jase. He’s got to go, or else he’ll come back to bite us all in the ass they say. James tries to stick up for Jase, I mean, they did have that big integrity talk and all, but in the end, he is spineless and agrees with the season 6ers. Kaysar goes to tell Jase that its going to be him on the block in George’s place, should he choose to use his PoV on himself (duh, of course he’s going to!!!). This does not sit well with Jase, who complains about being back doored (oooh, that sounds dirty, doesn’t it??) and storms out to the back yard where he proceeds to through a full out hissy fit. Throwing things, yelling, etc. Marcellas is dumb enough to take the bait and try to discuss this with Jase, which just turns into a big fight between the two with Marcellas declaring “Now I know why everyone in season 5 hated you!”

At the PoV ceremony James gives the two nominees a chance to speak for themselves. Will stands up and tells the stunned group that he wants to go home. He further says that he hates every one of them equally and asks George to NOT use the veto on him….vote him out. George stands up and gives some impassioned statement about how much he loves the game and isn’t ready to leave yet so he’s going to use the veto on himself. Duh. James then immediately puts Jase up there against the good Dr. Jase sits there with a look on his face like someone farted in the room. Going to be a very strange couple of days until the eviction ceremony.

For the record, the site where I get my screen caps, hamsterwatch.com has an opinion on who is going home, based on the talk going on in the house 24/7. I tend to agree, I think its going to Jase. I am beginning to believe that Dr. Will maybe IS the best player in all of the seasons so far. He has begged to go home on several occasions and is still there. Tune in tomorrow, Thursday, at 7pm CST, on CBS to find out.

**all my screencaps come from hamsterwatch.com, a great resource for live feed information. the blue lady in the corner is mine**

Another Sunday, another inane nomination ceremony in the house.  I wanna know who came up with stupid wheel-o-keys in the nomination ceremony.  It is supid, stupid, stupid.  Ah well, I’m not making the big bucks at CBS, so they didn’t think to ask me about it back when.  I’ll just get on with the recap.

Mike Boogie (**giggle**) is glad that Diane is still in the house after Thursday night because “she’s hot”.  He’s all about the potential “showmance” between him and Diane.  Did he not learn anything at all in season 2 with Krista?  Dumbass.  He also comments the season 6 aliance on their game play so far, giving “credit where credit is due”.  Ick.  Dr. Will is getting nervous in the service about the fate of Chilltown all of a sudden and Mike Boogie (**snort**) tries to calm him down by assuring him that season 6 will not put Chilltown up right now because James told Boogie (**hahahaha**) that putting up Chilltown would be too obvious.  And Boogie (**snicker**) believed James.  How cute is that?? 

James is completely irritated with Chicken George, as is a lot of the house.  He really does seem to be one of the “floater” characters that we’ve heard so much about this season.  He’s not as much playing the game as he is just kind of in it.  As the episode goes on, James whines (like the little bitch he is) more and more about George.  It is fairly obvious from the get go that Chicken George is very likely one of the houseguests nominated this week. 

Dr. Wll goes to talk with James about his nomination this week and his future in the BB house. Realistically, what does James think is going ot happen when/if it gets down to the final four and it is the season 6 alliance? Who does he think is going to be the first one they get rid of? Its obvious to everyone, including James, that he is on the very fringes of that alliance. Janelle, Kaysar and Howie Jackass are clearly the controlling group in the alliance. James asks Dr. Will if he will willingly let himself be put up for nomination against a person James hasn’t decided yet (whatevah…we all know its going to be Chicken George).

Everyone else goes to James, one at a time, to discuss the nominations. They all sing the same song ~ put up Chicken George and Jase. James listens to all their advice and proceeds to blow them all off. James is going to do what James is going to do.

Time for the food competition. There is slop available again this week, and they are all really striving to NOT be on slop rations. They divide up into teams of two to push a bowling ball up a hill. Not just any hill, a hill with holes in it. If they can get the ball all the way to the top of the hill, they win food for the house, plus a fancy catered meal of their choice. If the ball falls into any of the holes on the way up, there are a variety of things they can win food wise. Just 2 holes are for slop, and all of the houseguests avoid it like the plague. The other holes are for Veggies & Beer, Bread & Kumquats (I **heart** kumquats) and Meat & Ice Cream. All the teams make it to the top except for Danielle and Will who only manage to pull off Veggies & Beer and Bread & Kumquats and Marcellas and Janelle (who are quickly becoming the evil super twins) can only manage Veggies & Beer.

Mike Boogie (**snicker**) talks a lot.  All the time.  Apparently, he also talks constantly in his sleep.  Now, I’m a constant talker, but even I give it a rest during the night when I sleep – I think.  He is apparently creeping Janelle out though, because he speaks in tongues while sleeping.  You know how it is when someone is talking in their sleep….they are usually just mumbling along.  Oh well, anything that bugs Janelle is okay in my book.  Boogie (**hee hee**) says he’s been a sleep-talker his whole life and is totally nonplussed by the houses reaction to it, noting that anything he can do to bug the household is all good by him. 

I think my boyfriend, Kaysar, is cheating on the slut, Erika.  He and Danielle share a few sweet moments discussing her kids and her dedication to being a parent.  He melts when he sees her get all teared up thinking about when she’ll get to talk to her girls again.  He is either a genuine guy who has real feelings, or a genuine git who is playing Danielle to gain some kind of advantage in the game. 

Speaking of Kaysar, and of George as well I suppose…what the hell is this about??  I was checking out the site where I get my screen caps from, Hamsterwatch.com , and came across these pictures of George and Kaysar with shaved heads??!!??  I love me some Kaysar, with hair or not, but George looks like a fat Lex Luthor. 

Time for the stupid ass key pulling ceremony.  Chilltown is finally nervous after several weeks in the house.  They are both just sure they are the ones going up on the block.  After all the keys are pulled, everyone had one except for Dr. Will and Chicken George.  This nomination ceremony was not a huge shock to anyone who was watching and paying attention.  Dr. Will isn’t worried about being nominated and James really, really wants to get rid of Chicken George. 

Tune in Tuesday to see if either George or Dr. Will can win the Power of Veto and save themselves from nomination.  7pm CST, CBS – be there or be square. 

**all the screen caps on this page come from hamsterwatch.com, they update daily with screen caps from the live feeds.  the blue lady in the corner is mine. **

The second houseguest was evicted last night and it was no surprise to me (and shouldn’t have been to anyone else watching the show). I don’t totally agree with it, but I understand why it happened. Last night saw a lot of unusual things – the manlove between Howie Jackass and Dr. Will is heating up (at least on Howie Jackasses side), Marcellas and Janelle in a bubble bath together, a revealed potential super top secret aliance between two players, and of course, the return of the Chen-bot. I must say, she looked better last night in that little halter dress she was sporting. Okay, on to it.

Everyone seems to be disappointed in Erika’s decision to NOT use the PoV she earned Tuesday night. Even Dr. Will was a little upset. He certainly thought it would be him up on the block if she used it to save one of the girls and says he is very disappointed that he’s not up there. I can’t quite figure out his game. He is begging to be put on the nomination block each week. Why? What’s his plan for that?? As he is sitting there, looking like someone who just lost his best friend, Howie Jackass decides to come comfort him with a kiss on the cheek and what appeared to be an intimate neck rub while commenting on how “in shape” the good Dr. is getting while back in the house. :::::shudder:::::: Dr. Will just looks at Howie Jackass and says “You are a weird, weird dude!”, to which Howie Jackass beams and thanks the good Dr. Poor Will is being sexually harassed by Howie Jackass. Now that is something I wasn’t expecting to see this season!!

For some reason I can’t quite put my finger on, Janelle and Marcellas are taking a bubble bath together. Boredom must be getting the better of these people already. Granted, Janelle had on a bikini, and I assume Marcellas had on a swimsuit as well (he never stood up to show), but it was still kind of strange. The two of them have become like bestest buddies and Marcellas admits later in the Diary Room that he’d like the final two to be him and Janelle, exclaiming “That would be the most glamorous final two in BB history” and that it would be “so aesthetically pleasing”. Marcellas, you are quickly jumping into the running for Jackass of the house, although I doubt anyone can out jackass Howie Jackass.

While Diane is downstairs chilling with the Chill Town group, Nakomis sneaks up to the HoH room to talk with the season 6 people. She is campaigning hard to remain in the game, promising her soul to the dark alliance that is season 6. She is a strong player and can help them get rid of the flotsam and jetsam if they will just help keep her in the house. She is making a deal with the Devil, I tell ya.

The Chen-bot then contacts the houseguests on the TV screen to ask how the week was going, especially for those who have been on slop rations. Marcellas admits that he has not had a bite of food since his team lost the food competition. Boo hoo. Can I just ask? WTF is going on with Chicken George and that tin-foil suit? Huh?

She then turns off the two way and introduces a clip showing insight into another houseguests life outside of the BB7 house. This week it is my boyfriend, Kaysar. They talk to his sister and talk to some other family members/friends about how he is handling being a devout Muslim while inside the house. He does still pray and meditate 5 times a day while in the house, and that is admirable. He is also referred to as the “Muslim Brad Pitt of Big Brother”. Yup, I can buy that!! Even Marcellas admits that he is falling in love with Kaysar!!

There is apparently a big secret alliance going on between two players. Jase and Diane have been nicknamed “Mr. & Mrs. Smith” after the Brangelina movie. Maybe they do have a secret thing going on. Danielle Polly Potstirrer goes around to all the remaining houseguests to “prove” this alliance by pointing out several coincidences in the way these two play the game. She eventually gets ditzy Janelle to buy into her story. Jase, of course, denies, denies, denies. He doesn’t know what they are talking about. He then seeks Diane out to have a private conversation. Maybe this time Ms. Potstirrer is correct?

The Chen-bot clicks back to the houseguests and reveals the evicted person. It’s Nakomis. She has one minute to get her multi-tatooed, multi-hair colored ass outta the house. Buh-bye. I, for one, was not surprised by this. Diane really layed the poor pitiful me act thick this week. The voting was 8-2 against Nakomis. She goes out to see the Chen-bot claiming that she was gotten rid of because they are scared of her and she is a strong player. Meanwhile, back inside the house, Diane is crying (again) and thanking everyone for keeping her in for another week. Jase looks positively destroyed that it was Nakomis that went home. Is it an act?? Pshaw, I think so, he voted for Nakomis. Only Janelle and Dr. Will voted for Diane.

After her departure, Chen-bot gathers the houseguests around the TV screen to show them clips from each of the HoH competitions they’ve had so far this season and tells them to pay extra special attention. They are going to be asked questions about it shortly. They then head out to the backyard for the next HoH competition. Kaysar cannot participate since he is the outgoing HoH, but the rest line up like race horses in the starting gate to answer questions about the tiniest details in the clips they just saw.

After several rounds, it comes down to James and Danielle, with it actually coming to a tie breaker. James wins the stupid tie breaker question, where they had to guess the number of seconds that Janelle stayed on her perch in the first HoH competition. The one closest wins. Sadly, it is James that wins the battle, which shocks everyone in the house. So far, there has been a season 6 person in the HoH each week. Could this spell doom for the remainder of the house?

We’re just gonna have to wait and see. Tune in Sunday, at 7pm CST on CBS to find out if James is going to continue down the season 6 path or if he will have big enough balls to strike out and do something on his own. Somehow, I doubt it.

All images in this post from BB7 are taken from www.hamsterwatch.com. New pictures from the live feeds are posted here daily. That sexy blue lady in the corner?? She’s mine.

Let’s see, last nights BB7 had whipped cream, hot babes in bikini’s, Howie Jackass bare assed, golf and serious plotting against the season 6 people. Not a bad episode at all. It was, however, completely Chen-bot free. I’ve got a masochistic side I suppose and I’m beginning to miss the Chen-bot. I’ll get to see her on Thursday when she announces which of the two nominated houseguests, Diane or Nakomis, goes home this week. Then I’ll get my Chen-bot fix. That should help with the shakes and withdrawals.

The episode starts with Diane whining about the obvious. “Being nominated sucks.” No kidding, does it really? I can’t imagine, if you are in this to win the $500,000, that being nominated to possibly be out of the game would feel great. Diane retreats to her room and crawls into bed and cries and boo-hoos with Nakomis about how unfair it is that she has to go up against her only friend in the house for eviction this week. Kaysar comes in and tries to make peace with her, because he’s a softie like that and she is crying after all. She convinces him that its okay, its all just a game, but she is still hurt. Good lord, you knew this was going to happen eventually, its an integral part of the game! Sack up and be a woman about it. Hold your head high and have some dignity.

Nakomis is conflicted at being nominated with Diane. She likes Diane. She doesn’t want to go up against her friend. On the other hand, she is worried because Diane is being so emotional and is crying and laying around in bed like her new puppy just died. She is emotionally manipulating the house into not voting for her, for feeling sorry for her. I say go Diane! You’ve got to use whatever power you may have on your side to keep yourself in the game. This schtick would not work with Nakomis…no one would believe it. So, Nakomis is just going to keep on being Nakomis. She dyes her hair half yellow and half flaming red. And she wonders why no one “gets her”.

Mike Boogie (**snicker**) is a first class ass hole. After seeing the episode last night, I’ve decided that I don’t really care for him. He came into Diane’s room, crawled onto the bed with her, gave her hugs, kisses and coos about how he was so sorry she was nominated, that it came as a complete shock to him and he would NEVER make a deal with Kaysar about her. LIAR!!!! He and Dr. Will sat in the HoH room with Kaysar when he told them he was going to nominate the “floaters” Diane and Nakomis and Mike Boogie (**snort**) was jumping for joy about it. Ass hole. I hate liars. Hate them, hate them, hate them.

Instead of fish this season, CBS decided to grace the house with a more unusual pet. 4 giant, scary, hairy, nasty tarantulas. Ewwwww. Janelle thought maybe something more feminine, like kittens, would have been more appropriate. They decide to name the 4 spiders after 4 of the houseguests that did NOT make it into this season. The little one is Cowboy, the ugly one is Monica, the hairy one is Bunky and the pretty (??!!??) one is Lisa.

Marcellas and Janelle are heading to bed when they walk past the wall of headshots of all the houseguests. They decide that they are a very good looking bunch of ass hats and should be on a soap opera. They stand there, whispering and inventing characters. Dr. Will is the “evil manipulator”, Erika is the “sultry brunette”, Diane is the “trailer park trash girl”, Chicken George is the “friendly janitor”, Howie Jackass is the “pervert at the office that grabs everyone’s ass”, Boogie (**hahahahaha**) is the “straight guy who is secretly having a gay affair with Marcellas” and Janelle is an “ad executive/former model”. They name this little slice of hell “Radford Place” and very pleased with themselves as they head to bed.

Meanwhile, Dr. Will is holding court in the hot tub with his stupid, girlie headband on. He is talking to all the remaining houseguests (except for season 6 of course) about how they all have to band to gether and get season 6 out of the house. In a move that could either classified as brave or incredibly dumb, Will sends Jase (the Shirtless One) up to get Kaysar from the HoH room to discuss his nomination of Diane and Nakomis. Kaysar plays along, comes down and is confronted by the angry group about his nominations. They all like both Diane and Nakomis and don’t want to vote for either of them. Kaysar turns it around and asks Will who should be on the chopping block instead. Looking a bit like a deer in the headlights for a moment, Will finally stutters that it should be HIM instead. He’ll volunteer to go up on the eviction block. Kaysar just shakes his (sexy) head and walks away, back up to the HoH room.

At some point during the show last night, Howie Jackass decided to take a shower in Kaysar’s HoH room. Kaysar slipped his headphones on and tuned out while Howie Jackass was in the shower. The best part is that Mr. Jackass forgot a towel. He spent 5 minutes yelling for Kaysar to come bring him a towel to no avail because of the headphones. He finally hopped out and got one himself, complaining that it was cold in there and it was making Howie Jackass Jr. (his dick) a shrinking violet (if you get my meaning). On CBS it was all blurred out, but not in the live feeds. Wow. He may a complete Jackass, but he’s got a nice butt.

The Power of Veto competion was dumb last night. Kaysar, Diane and Nakomis were the first three players (as the nominated and HoH) and they spun a wheel to determine the other three players at random. It ended up being Dr. Will, Erika and James. They traipse out to the backyard, which has been turned into a pseudo golf course, complete with water hazard and sandtrap. They played with oversized nerf type balls and huge clubs. The object was to get your ball closest to the green, which was marked “Give 1″. In concentric rings away from the green were areas marked with numbers which indicate how many balls the player had to put in their own tube. If you racked up 7 balls in your tube, your out of the game. A hole-in-one results in the player being able to empty their tube of all accumulated balls.

This right here folks? This is yet another gratuitous Kaysar shot. I can’t help myself. The man is just too entirely good looking. I hate that he is aligned with those season 6 jerks, but dayum…is he good looking.

Okay, okay, sorry about that.  Back to the synopsis. They all sucked at this game, including Dr. Will, who made the remark that he is one of the few doctors he knows that doesn’t play golf. Nakomis and Diane were out almost immediately, as was James and Dr. Will. It came down to Kaysar and Erika and it turns out that Erika is a pretty decent golfer. She wins the Power of Veto. She alone now has the power to save one of the nominated and put someone else up on the block.

Before the PoV ceremony can take place however, Mike Boogie (**giggle**) is called into the house from the yard, to be surprise by a huge birthday celebration, including champagne, sushi and Erika in a bikini with “Happy Birthday” spelled out on her legs in whipped cream. He dives into her legs like a dog on a bone and licks it all off of her. Nasty. Dr. Will tortured Howie Jackass with the sushi, because remember, half the house is on slop rations for the week. It was great entertainment! Marcellas sulked like a little bitch, crying that it wasn’t fair that they had the birthday party when HE couldn’t enjoy the goodies. I swear he almost stomped his feet and held his breath like a 3 year old!

Erika calls everyone in for the PoV ceremony, where she gives Diane and Nakomis a chance to plead their cases about why they should not be evicted. I, personally, think this is mean because the person holding PoV rarely ever uses it to save anyone, so why put them through that torture. But, it is part of the game, so it goes on. Both give some lame excuse as to why they shouldn’t be evicted, and with that, Erika takes off the PoV charm, says she isn’t going to use it to save anyone, and puts it back in its velvet lined box. All that drama for that. Sheesh.

Tune in to CBS Thursday, at 7pm CST, for the eviction ceremony. I will be watching, if for nothing else, to get my Chen-bot fix.

Sunday’s episode of BB7: All-Stars brought two new nominees to the chopping block and is starting to show some cracks in what could have been perceived as rock solid alliances. And, we got to see all these stupid people digging through troughs of nastiness to catch rats with their teeth. This is what TV entertainment is all about!

No one much cares one way or the other about Alison being voted out on Thursday. She was not liked by anyone in the house, so her absence is not making a huge impact on the houseguests. Danielle is still there, and is still being Polly Potstirrer. She goes to Janelle to tell her all about how Alison plotted to get Janelle out of the house, it was all Alison’s idea, Alison was the one who was talking to everyone about it. Danielle needs to get a grip before Karma bites her in the ass…hard. Does she forget that it was HER who started it all? She intentionally went to Alison with that stupid plan because she knew that Alison would get all over it? Karma Danielle, Karma.

Kaysar and Howie Jackass, in the HoH room, discuss breaking up Chilltown by nominating Will and doing something about Nakomis because they feels she’s a very strong player in the house. Janelle slinks into the room to discuss what’s going on with the nomination this week. She strikes out to find James, the last of the season 6′ers, but finds that he is distancing himself from the group. He claims its a reconnasaince mission for the alliance, but Janelle ain’t buying that for a nickel. She thinks he’s out playing all the sides again, making promises to everyone and lying to all. We’ll see. James does tell the season 6 alliance that Jase is completely with Chilltown (Will and Mike Boogie {**snicker**}). They all leave the room without knowing for sure who Kaysar intends to nominate. I don’t think at this point that even Kaysar knows who he’s going to nominate.

Okay, now I have a problem. There is a new slut in the house and her name is Erika. She is working my boyfriend, Kaysar, over!! She is shamelessly flirting with him, pretending she’s an idiot bobbleheaded girl (maybe she really is?) to get his attention – and its working. Blech! She even turns on the tears about her dog dying, her boyfriend leaving her, etc. All of it is a plan to get Kaysar to feel sorry for her, and shower her with affection. ICK! Leave him alone Erika….I’m just sayin’.

Howie Jackass and Will continue their “showmance” with each other, but now we are starting to see the undercurrent of what is really there. Howie Jackass remarks about how pale Dr. Will is. Yeah, he makes vampires look tan, doesn’t he? Turns out Dr. Will is a dermatologist and figures it might be bad ettiquette for him to show up to his appointments all tan while lecturing his patients on the virtues of staying out of the sun. Good call Dr. Will. The good Dr. says a few nasty things about Howie Jackass (remarks about his lack of intelligence and his overly tanned and wrinkled face) which pisses James off (he’s such a whiny little bitch, isn’t he??).

Jase gets caught red-handed hanging in the hottub with the Chilltown alliance, which he quickly explains away by claiming to be gathering information on them to help the season 6 folks out. Uh, whatever. Jase, you are clearly playing every side of the dice and you just got caught.

The first food competition is up. If you haven’t watched the show before, they split the group into two teams and make them do some inane competition. The winning team gets great food all week while the losing team gets garbage. That usually means that the losers live on PB&J’s for a week, but in this case, it is literally GARBAGE. The houseguests are split into a red team (Mike Boogie {**giggle**}, Will, Chicken George, Jase, Diane, Erika) and a blue team (Howie Jackass, Kaysar, Janelle, Danielle, Marcellas, Nakomis), and then paired off into teams of two, their arms are tied together. They must dig through a pig trough full of slop looking for rats. Not with their hands mind you, with their teeth. GROSSSS! Once the rat is picked up, the team must run back to a cage and drop it in.

Nakomis makes a huge error (besides being tied to Marcellas) and gets the bandana around her neck in her mouth and thinks its a rat. She runs back, drops her bandana in the cage and thereby loses the competition for the blue team. Marcellas is furious, and the blue team has to eat the pig slop for the entire week. And its all Nakomis’ fault. Don’t think that little tidbit goes unnoticed. As a side note, Jase thinks its HILARIOUS that the entire season 6 group is eating slop for the week. So, he’s apparently not as loyal to season 6 as he wants them to believe (duh)!

Excited that his team won, the good Dr. Will actually dives back into the slop, forgetting that he was still tethered to Erika. In the process of doing this, he actually hurt her and didn’t realize it. Note to self: NEVER go see Dr. Will in a professional capacity. Kaysar rides his shining white horse in and rescues the maiden fair (slut) from her stinking trough of yuck. She declares in the diary room: “I love him”.

Danielle is NOT happy about losing and having to eat slop for a week, and utters the line that is the title of this post. “You do realize I’m an ALL-STAR?”, like it makes her royalty or something. Sweetie, not only did you willingly sign up for this, you actively campaigned to be on this show again. Shut up.

Kaysar summons the Chilltown alliance to his hot pad and discusses the nominations. He wants to get rid of the stragglers, the ones without a clear alliance, the ones who will ride on everyone elses coattails to the end. Read: Nakomis and Diane. After their meeting, Kaysar says he still isn’t sure who’s getting nominated and Dr. Will and Mike Boogie (**snort**) are just sure its going to be them, despite what Kaysar said.

The dumbest ever key pulling ceremony begins and all the expected folks pull their keys. Howie Jackass, Janelle, James, etc…the last key pulled is Dr. Will, which shocks and surprises him to no end. So, in the end, Kaysar chose to nominate Nakomis (who looked pissed) and Diane (who looked saddened) to flush out the “stragglers”.

Tune in Tuesday at 7pm CST on CBS to see the next installment, and see who wins the Power of Veto. I know I can’t wait….

This is simply a gratuitous Kaysar shot….**sigh**

Last night’s BB7 finally brought us the first eviction.  Before I get to the show recap, can we talk about the Chen-bot?  Pah-leese?  The woman is beautiful, no doubt.  She is also filthy damn rich.  She is married to Leslie Moonves, the president of CBS, for pitys sake.  So, why, oh why, does she wear the most hideous clothes EVER?  That little white tank top ensemble from last nights show was awful.  Chen-bot, listen up….you need a new stylist.  Quickly. 

Okay, on to the show.  Danielle and Alison are both walking on egg shells knowing that one of them is going home.  At this point, there is nothing else they can do about it except wait.  The whore against the instigator.  Which one will go home is honestly a mystery at the beginning of the episode.  The house seems to be very divided about the issue, but oh, how the editing is deceiving. 

Both begin making promises to all the housemates about their future behavior in the house should they not be evicted.  Danielle promises Chicken George that she will never nominate him and tells Janelle that she would not come after the season 6 alliance.  Mike Boogie (**snort**) probably summed up the houses feelings fairly well when he says that there is great motivation to keep Alison around over Danielle because of the potential for claws out, hair pulling, name calling fighting that would surely erupt between Alison and Janelle.  Jase flat lies to Alison (which is beginning to be a pattern with the Shirtless One) and says he fully supports her, which gives her a false sense of security, which I think is her ultimate undoing.  Her biggest, dumbest, mostest blonde moment in the game is when James stops her to ask who she thinks her support is in the house.  She names them all then stands there and tells James that if she is not evicted, her target is the season 6 folks.  Uh, hello?  You stupid twit, James is one of those season 6 folks. 

Danielle goes to Janelle to try and rally support and feels that she came into the house with a bad rap because of the shitty way she behaved in season 3.  She then goes to the diary room and cries for America to see about how she’s changed and she’s not that person any more and its just not fair that she is being judged that way.  Janelle, Erika and Marcellas discuss the virtues of voting out Alison over Danielle.  Marcellas, who hates Danielle in the same way I hate my ex-husband, is very torn.  Should he vote out his mortal enemy Danielle, or do what’s best for the house and vote out Alison?  He utters the phrase ”How do you choose between gonorrhea or the clap?  What do you do?”  Folks, I could not make this stuff up.  As long as Marcellas stays in the house, I’ll have a great quote each episode.   

The Chen-bot gathers the housemates to discuss the evenings events.  In her very dramatic fashion, she reminds them all that one of them is going home.  That.Very.Evening.  As is they haven’t all played the game before.  Duh. 

She takes this opportunity to dig a little into the actual lives of some of the players.  But not before she gets into a very hot, burning issue so far this season.  The love connection.  But not your every day, boy/girl love connection.  She wants to know what is going on between Howie Jackass and Dr. Will.  Howie Jackass (wearing a gratiuitous “Thanks Julie” tee-shirt) gushed about his love for Dr. Will.  He said that the guy is the best BB player – EVER – and has lost a few pounds and stayed out of the sun before coming into the All Star house.  I still say its weird and I’m waiting to see what Howie Jackass is up to. 

The Chen-bot turns her attention to Jase, one of the HoH’s for this week.  Let’s take a look back at Jase from the last time he was on the show, shall we?  In season 5, Jase was a Howie Jackass wannabe.  He was loud, obnoxious and generally immature and irritating.  He seems to have calmed down a bit since his previous appearance, which he attributes to his new girlfriend.  He is playing this time on the edge though and he needs to be careful.  He’s doing what James did in season 6 and making promises to everyone on the show.  As long as he keeps taking his shirt off, I’m all good with the new Jase. 

Next up is the life and times of a whore Alison.  The Chen-bot gathered up her season 4 love interest, Justin (the entire cast was technically her love interest, but she seems to have settled on just one for the most part – when not bed hopping) and her current boyfriend.  The current boyfriend is a doctor and seems to be a bit nerdy.  Didn’t seem like her type at all, but hey, to each their own I suppose.  The new boyfriend speaks about her bad reputation (well earned) from season 4 and how much she’s changed.  He actually said that if she plays with good morals and integrity, she’ll go far.  Not in this game she won’t.  What planet is the nerd from?  Nerdrovia?  In the Nerdovan Galaxy? 

The two boy lovebirds are both of the same mind regarding keeping Alison around – sort of.  Will is looking forward to the blonde on blonde hate that happens when you put two pretty blonde girls in a house and Howie Jackass wants to keep her around because she looks good in a bikini.  Jackass. 

The houseguests all gather in front of the TV to find out who is getting the boot.  In a not surprising vote (to anyone, including Alison), garnering a 8-2 vote for eviction, Alison is the first person voted out of the house.  She has one minute to say good bye, pick up her bag and beat hell out of the house.  Everyone is all smiles and hugs as she’s leaving, but I seriously doubt any of it was sincere.  She then heads out to meet up with the Chen-bot and watch what her housemates have to say about her and discuss what it was like being in the house.  For the record, only Nakomis and Diane vote for Danielle.  Everyone else (except for the nomiated and the HoH’s) voted for Alison. 

Now, its time for the next HoH competition.  It’s another twist!!  Oh, bestill my heart, 2, TWO, sneaky twists in one week on this show??  The HoH competition is called “Alison Rules”, and involves the newly evicted.  The remaining houseguests are lined up for a True or False trivia game about Alison – with Alison standing right there in front of them!  Oh, the twists are just too clever for me on this show! (/sarcasm)

The first question knocks all the contestants out of the running except for 3 people.  In the end, it comes down to a battle between Nakomis and my boyfriend, Kaysar, and of course, he won.  Because he is a stud that way.  **le pant, le purrrr**  So, for the next week Kaysar gets to live in the hot pad upstairs where he can eavesdrop, spy, observe all the other houseguests from the safety of his own soundproof room. 

Tune in on Sunday night at 7pm CST on CBS for the next episode.  I imagine it will involve the nomination of the next two houseguests to be put up for eviction.  One can only hope that one of them is Howie Jackass. 

Last night was a dirty, stinky (literally), plotting episode of Big Brother 7: All-Stars! It was time for the Power of Veto competition for the first round of nominations, and it did not go as well as either Danielle or Alison had hoped. There is so much anger in this house already. CBS ought to hire a therapist to come in and deal with these people. Hey! That sounds like a great idea for a show, it’s CBS’s next blockbuster reality show – you mark my words.

ANYWAY, the episode started off with Danielle and Alison actually acting shocked that they were nominated on Thursday night. Honestly girls, a blind man could have seen that one coming. Those two tried to shake things up and turn the house against Janelle, and expected it to NOT get back to her. Stupid. Each went to the HoH room to try to plead their case. I’ve got to give it to Danielle. That is one manipulative little minx. She managed to make it look like SHE was the victim in this grand master plot by Alison. Let’s all remember that Danielle is the one that started all this and Alison just followed along like a little lemming. Alison just managed to further alienate the housemates with her whining and pleading. She is already not trusted because of her lies, so I am afraid she may be toast.

There is something odd afoot in the BB7 house. I think Howie Jackass is in love with Will. I don’t mean admires him, I mean I think he loves him. Will has renamed the BB6 alliance the Sea Sick alliance (not sure why), and is concerned about sharing living space with his “personal stalker” Howie Jackass. I personally think Howie Jackass is just snuggling up to Will to gleam some information he can use to boot him and Mike Boogie (**snicker**) out of the house.

Alison overhears Jase and Janelle discussing the two nominees for eviction – because she was snooping from the HoH room – and again declares war on Janelle, claiming “her ass is MINE”. Hmmm, sounds like love to me, no? Whatever. Everyone in the house is plotting ways to destroy the BB6 aliance and quickly. Most of them want to start by getting rid of Janelle. They seem to think that she is the head of the monster and if you cut off the head, the rest will die quickly. Of course Alison wants her gone (I think we’ve established that) and so does Boogie (**giggle**) and Diane. This is all a moot point right now however as Janelle is not up for eviction. Keep dreaming and plotting for next week folks.

Erika and Marcellas share a difference of opinion between the two nominees. Erika wants Alison gone due to a past betrayal and Marcellas wants Danielle gone for a past betrayal. This voting session will be oh so interesting if the house is all this divided. Marcellas declares the only reason he came back to the game was to ensure that Danielle gets the boot as soon as possible. Marcellas has the best quote of the night as declares the situation at hand to be like having “Hell in one hand and Hell in the other”.

It would appear right now that Chicken George may have the best winning strategy in the game today. He is going to snore everyone out of the house! Sweet lord, I have to wonder how that man’s wife sleeps in the same bed, let alone same house, as he does every night. It’s so LOUD. And it is sleep depriving Will and irritating him. Will is just about ready to walk out on his own just to get a good nights sleep. I used to be married to a snorer, and I can certainly understand his pain. Go Chicken George, go! You get one good cold or sinus infection while in the house and you may wake up and find yourself the winner because everyone is just going to leave!

I can’t even discuss the slip and slide folks. I’m just sayin.

Now its time for the Power of Veto (PoV) competition. The houseguests are informed it is a “diving” competition. They all suit up in their bathing suits, with Janelle in a bright red one that makes her look like she belongs on Baywatch, and wait for the fun exciting water based stunt. Wow, were they wrong!! Silly rabbits, you aren’t diving in water, you are diving in a trash DUMPSTER! A stinky, smelly, nasty dumpster! There are a number of PoV symbols hidden amongst the nasty disgusting trash heap and they must dive around inside to find six of them. First one to find six wins the Veto, which allows them to save someone who is nominated. As an added treat, just to make sure that EVERYONE got nasty and gross, they were all covered in rotting PB&J sandwiches, hair from the old Big Brother house drains and coated with rancid, rotting food and water waste. It was quite nasty.

Despite having an early lead, my boyfriend Kaysar did not win. That damn Janelle won and immediately Danielle and Alison know that one of them is going home for sure. With the power of veto, Janelle could remove one of them from the nomination chopping block and predictably chooses not to. But, just to be cruel and hateful, she calls them both in and allows them to plead their cases as to why they should be given the veto and then says she will not be using the PoV to remove anyone this week. These two girls better pack their bags because one of them is going home.

Tune in Thursday to see who got evicted, 7pm CST on CBS. I’ll guess right now that it will be Alison. They don’t like Danielle, but everyone seems to have a grudge against Alison. Which means no free porn for us Americans. Dammit.